Sometimes you just have to accept the fact that nobody is on your side. You feel like you are the loneliest person alive, and everything is so unfair. Then again, it’s life; something full of up and downs. I can’t find my answers. I am now lying my head on Naila’s lap and watching a movie. We sorted our troubles out. She is engaged, and what happened wasn’t fair. At least, this temporary relationship, or whatever isn’t going to last forever. I can’t get over the fact that I am with the most beautiful girl I’ve seen, romancing with me. And yet, I can feel the presence of silence, the reason for me being solitary.
Instead of asking her why she hid this fact from me, I felt guilty for stealing someone else’s girl, even if it was for a moment. I can’t explain how horrible these days are going for me. Just with the blink of an eye, the wedding reception and other programs are finished too. Soon, these will just be memories on an album that will be locked inside a closet and not be easily viewed. Or maybe we will relive those moments by playing the memories all over again. Just a week left. I will fly away to Australia. Everybody will get back to their normal lives. Should I break her engagement up? Should I do something we both deserve?
Within our dance rehearsals, brunch meals, adda sessions (chat sessions), Naila fell in love with me. Just like me, it was hard for her to not be with me forever too. She liked the change in me, and I won’t judge her for that.
“Naila? Can you pause the movie?” I said.
As she paused, I continued, “Who is this Feroz guy you are getting married to?”
“He is an architect.”
“And a playboy,” I interrupted.
“How do you know he is a playboy?” Naila seemed to get disappointed.
“How do you know he is not?”
No offence girls, but so far, all the girls that my friends came across and now I came across seems to share a similar characteristic. Say something valid, and you are someone who deserves to get slapped. Weird.
We used to fight about something every day. Either it was about Feroz, or about why I left her, and blah blah blah. But I used to creep into her room every night when Shahnaz and Fariha was asleep, and make the memories we would soon need to miss.
One night we got kind of caught. Shahnaz pat my back while I was taking Naila out of the room for a midnight drive.
“And where are my love birds going?”
Naila felt really embarrassed. Indeed, this is not a good impression to make just a few weeks before your marriage.
“It’s okay Naila. Sometimes, it’s alright to be different. I wish you live the moments that can bring smile to your face all your life.” Naila hugged her.
That night, when we got into the car, Naila talked about her marriage.
“It freaks me out.”
“Feroz. I don’t know that person. He maybe a psychopath. Who knows he won’t ever love me? Who knows, if he’s a criminal? It’s just been weeks I’ve known him, and it freaks me out to live with someone you don’t even know properly.”
“Then why are you marrying him, dumbo?”
“Where the hell were you when I was getting engaged? You avoided me ever since I rejected you.”
See? Valid points, and bad behavior is what you get in return.
And that is how the rest of the week passed away. It was time for me to go back to my life. I could have done something about it if Naila was not engaged. Within these seven days, we made the most perfect moments ever, and yet, those weren’t and never will be enough. We promised that we would be really close to each other, and I’d come back to attend her wedding. We promised that we’d forget all our fights, and at least try to be the best friends. Or maybe none of this happened. Maybe the last seven days passed like any other day, in my loneliness. Blur and Crystal was just a tear fall away for me.
“Promise me.” Naila said as she cried, “Promise me that you won’t ever forget me. And that we’d skype every now and then.”
“I promise Naila.”
We both knew it that I wouldn’t maintain the promise I made. After all, who wants to come over those bitter memories? As I was being called for the boarding pass, the whole Biyebaari month just went through my brain like a glimpse. The music we danced along played on my mind. I hugged Tahsin, and my other friends.
And just within these three steps, a valuable portion of my life went away. I was covered with Ecstasy when those feelings came back. I believed in Empathy when we confided in each other. Naila now believes in eternity. The eternity that will never bring an end of us. No ending is perfect. Or is it?
Six months later
I was having a conversation on Facebook with Naila.
Naila: You forgot me, kiddo.
Me: Naah…Just busy with work, that’s all.
Naila: Shahnaz will call you in an hour.
Me: What for?
Naila: She is getting married. Wants you to come over for some time.
I smiled as I read that. I knew it that Naila would do anything to spend time with me, and even dance with me for her wedding. Even if she would do it as just a friend, I was glad she thought so. My grin was all over my face.
Me: Another Biyebaari? 😉